Life Lessons

All I Really Needed to Know I Learned from My Mother and Father

(Adapted from Robert Fulghum -All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten)

In Memory of my Parents – Albert and Antoinette

Auntie and Uncle Al at Canal
Most of what I really need to know about how to live, and what to do, and how to be, I learned from my mother and father. For me, learning was not found in formal schooling as much as it was listening to and observing my mother and father and other caring adults every day including the first day my mom walked me to Kindergarten.

These are the things I learned from my mother. Share your things.  Take turns. Don’t hurt people. When you are done using something, put it back where it belongs. Clean up the mess, whether it is yours or not. Wash your hands and face before you eat. Flush the toilet. Change your underwear every day. A little piece of homemade chocolate cake cures just about anything.  Live a balanced life, everything in moderation. Be thoughtful and be thankful.

These are the things I learned from my father. Learn something new every day and use your talents. Work hard and take pride in your work. Always do your very best. Use your mind, think first- then speak, and speak only if needed. Learn from others and share what you know. Life is not always fair – but treat others fairly. Forgive. Humor cures just about anything.

They both taught me that pets are like family members, care for them, love them, have fun with them. At some point you have to let them go. They die. So do we. Letting go is part of loving deeply.

Wouldn’t it be great if we all – the whole world – had our moms and dads and other loving adults teach us everything we needed to know about life.  These first few years are the foundation upon which every subsequent educational experience is built. When the foundation is strong the journey usually is as well. When the foundation is incomplete or unsteady the educational climb is challenging but not impossible.

I have discovered that everything really important in life can be learned without going to a place called “school.”

The problem with homework

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/parenting/leah-mclaren-too-much-homework-stifling-your-kids-let-them-just-say-no/article29885101/

Reading this article reminded me of the many times I had to help my own four children with their homework when they were young students. Being a teacher myself, I found it extremely frustrating to see the kind of homework assignments that were given on a daily basis.  Often they made no sense at all.

I didn’t want to rock the boat for my kids, so most of the time I just helped them until they got it and then finished it on their own. Occasionally, I wrote the teacher, with what I considered a helpful but not scathing note, providing them with my insights on the assignment. Most of the time, I never heard back from them. Once in awhile they would send me a note back explaining their rationale.

As a teacher I understood that you can’t please everyone. I also saw how students in my own classroom seemed to do better when I did not pile on tons of homework. I discovered early in my teaching career that homework was not essential to learning. It was a nightmare to check every day and a colossal waste of their time and mine. It also created the “have and have-nots” conundrum. Those who had solid support structures at home followed through. Others had insurmountable odds that would never level the playing field for them.

The few times that I did ask for some work to be done at home, I did the unspeakable in the world of teaching. With parent agreement, I gave my students my home phone number and told them to call me if they were having trouble with homework. I had a few calls here and there, but they never abused the offer and frequently appreciated that I was there to speak with them. I did this for years and I remember my mother laughing at me and saying, “…who else does this?” It never took more than a few minutes, and it was so well worth it in the long run.

Some of my students needed someone to answer the phone and other students never called me. I realized that relationships mean everything and if we as teachers are willing to have them with our students, amazing things can happen.

The problem with most homework stems from the teacher and parent perception that is it important and vital to the learning process. It is not – and this article reiterates that point. Some food for thought!

 

 

Learning Unleashed: Reimagining and Repurposing Our Schools

What makes this book different from others that have tackled the question of what’s wrong with our schools? For me, it’s an entry point of sorts to the many questions, hunches, and revelations that have been swirling around in my mind for over fifty years. Given that I have spent my entire life in and around schools and believe passionately that learning is the most exciting and rewarding human endeavor, I decided to share what I have experienced and observed related to this industrial-aged experiment we call school.

Schools have not kept up with the changing world in which we live nor have they provided peak learning experiences for most children. On the contrary, schools continue to experiment with recycled strategies and so called “research-based” reforms that have little to no impact on student learning. What we see are isolated practices that may bring about small change but nothing substantial or long lasting.

Books are written touting the effects of these “proven” strategies and the writers take their research on the road with an exorbitant price tag to match their claims. Educators flock to the conferences seeking the latest research that might make a difference for students. We then consume these strategies in massive quantities hoping to see results or find the silver bullet that will yank our students up to an acceptable level of performance.

We indoctrinate the teaching ranks on these “highly-effective, research-based” strategies and hope for the kind of transfer that will equate to fewer drop-outs and better test scores. However, what is happening on a regular basis in most schools and what we do quite well is “force-fed” learning. This is replicated every day all over the country and packaged as a “must have” product called school.